US pinoyjokes1

Q. What's the difference between corruption in the US and corruption in the Philippines ?

A. In the U.S. they go to jail. In the Philippines , they go to the U.S.

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IDD call from US:

HUSBAND: hon musta ang tindahan?
WIFE: dept store na!

HUSBAND: ang tuba-an?
WIFE: KTV bar na!

HUSBAND: and mga trickad?
WIFE taxi na!

HUSBAND: ang dalawa kong anak?
WIFE: LIMA na!

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PINOY CONTRACTOR ABROAD

Three contractors are bidding to fix the White House fence.

One from the Philippines , another from Mexico and an American.

They go with a White House official to examine the fence.

The American contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. Well,"
he says. "I figure the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me."

The Mexican contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me."

The Filipino contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers: "$2,700."

The official, incredulous, says, "What? You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure? How do you expect me to consider your service with that bid??

"Easy," the Pinoy explains, "$1,000 for you, $1,000 for me and we hire the guy from Mexico ".

The next day, the Pinoy and the Mexican are working on the Fence.